Every Day Atheist

The journal of a midwestern atheist.

Oct 6
I’m Notable!

I’m Notable!

Sep 22

I’m going to bow out of this account for a while

If you’d like to continue our relationship, head to my personal blog.

I think I’ve had my fill on a dashboard filled strictly with religious topics. Not to say I won’t bring it up anymore, but I’d like to expand the surface area of my ideas and personalize the conversation.


Sep 21

Totally just ran this command in my Terminal

$ rm -rf ~/.god

Happy x-month anniversary

Anniversary: from Latin anniversarius ‘returning yearly,’ from annus ‘year’ + versus ‘turning.’

Not monthly. Now stop saying that shit. Especially when x == 1

Sep 20

Sep 19

On woo girls.


Every time I “party”, I lose my voice. I currently sound like a 90 year old smoker after a ragin’ bachelorette weekend. Any tips so I don’t regularly show up to work sounding like I’ve been downing tequila shots all weekend?

If you’re the type of simple bitch who puts the word party in quotation marks, then you’re also the type who screams “Woo!” at the top of your sloppy cunt lungs whenever one of your sloppy cunt friends does a shot.

Stop that annoying shit. Not only will you have a voice the next day, but everyone will hate you less.

Let this be a reiteration of the fact that a bar where conversation amongst friends is possible is preferable to all other bars.

Facebook asked me if I want to “Like” the Bible.

Haha, no thanks, Facebook.

Sep 15

Where do atheists turn in troubling times?

I’ve recently been through what I consider a little rut. I was uncertain how I felt about my job, my relationship, and my direction into the future.

And for a minute, I wondered to myself: well where in the hell do atheists turn? This is the one thing I started to miss about being a believer. It was so easy to pray, to talk to clergy, etc. Then it hit me: I called my best friend. I invited another one over. I hashed it out. I came clean. I confessed my rut to my friends, to myself, and to my girlfriend. I wrote it out in an anonymous letter to an advice column.

And within a week, I already feel better. I decided to make some small changes in my personal habits and diet, which don’t involve my job or my girlfriend. And it’s been working out. My perspective has updated just a little bit to provide me with a more positive outlook on my situation. It wasn’t my surroundings that needed to change, it was my attitude toward them.

Admittedly, this is what a so-called `true` Christian will tell you is the point of prayer. That it’s not to get God to do things for you, but for you to focus on what’s really important. The saying goes, “prayer isn’t for God to change His mind, but for you to change your heart.” 

Well, then prayer is unnecessary, isn’t it? God is a redundant variable here. What matters is confession, a confidant, the courage to take a real, hard look in the mirror, and commitment to pursue personal change.

Other options atheists have include studying history and ethics, or reading autobiographies, philosophy, and an assortment of myths from religious texts.

When writing important emails

I always think to myself: “What would it have to look like to pass as evidence on Judge Judy?”

Plus, I mean

Babies always work through a biological process. Without exception, there are two parents who must exchange genetic information and the baby always matches that combination. Not once has a couple ever just been handed a baby by god or some other form of magic. Yea I know that’s what the bible says happened with Jesus, but the bible also says snakes and donkeys talked to people.

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